Smiles won’t hide your Chronic Pain

Do you suffer from chronic pain? 

If you do I’m sorry it totally sucks!

chronic pain

Since I was 16 I’ve had issues with my back. To give you a background I fell down some tile stairs in Playa las Americas, Tenerife. ( as if that was 10years ago, wooow, how time flys) After an argument with my partner at the time. I made it down 4 lots of stairs before the last step. I’ll never forget that moment my coccyx connected with the last step. My whole spine Jarred and I slipped a disk in my left shoulder or so it felt that way. I lay on the ground with no-one around. The maid was cleaning the room right next to where I landed and ignored my yells for help. I was screaming due to the pain. I will never forget that feeling. I knew something wasn’t right. I immediately thought I had damaged my spine. I wasn’t sure if I was able to get up and walk.

Luckily my partner and his mother came running down after realised I had stormed out. They helped me back to the room. I was in agony. To be honest I should have went to hospital. The last 3days of my holiday were agonising. If I went In the pool I had to hold onto a float. I couldn’t walk further than a few metres. We had to get taxis everywhere. paracetamol didn’t quite cover the pain. I was dreading the flight home.

Soon as I got home I had an x-ray. This then lead to 3 years of Physio. She informed me at the time you will most likely get Arthritis when you are older. I am super hyper mobile which is partly a reason she said it’s more than likely. I now had nerve damage, Great!

This whole experience ruined my dance chances. Not that I was amazing but having been in a performing arts 🎭 background I had to stop my dance school. This effected my college too. I grinned and bared it. As what else could I have done?

The pain comes and goes. When I get a chronic attack, I can’t move. I feel like I’m being electrocuted in my lower spine by thousands of tiny little knifes. Sometimes the sciatica kicks in that’s a treat in a half. The last time I woke up with it. I was trying to get ready for work. Ha, that was fun.

Walking around on my break to get away from the office chair was a delight. I had shooting pains which stopped me from moving for a few minutes a couple of my friends were like “Emm….you ok?” Yup! I’m good just give me a min.
If you say to people, “Oh, it’s just Sciatica”. They say OMG!! Are you pregnant??? I thought only pregnant people got that.LOL…..NO! Jeeez pregnancy will be fun then! Not that I’m planning that for a few years.

Anyone else having a bad time at the minute? so far I’ve cried 3 times in agony when I’ve tried to lie down. my partners so nice. He tired to rub my back, he asks what he can do but I don’t have an answer for him. I just have to grin and bare the pain while it lasts.

I’ve currently tried hot baths, hot water bottle, painkillers, Pilates, yoga. Anything that I can self medicate the pain. I don’t like going to the doctors. I spent enough time back last year when I had my shoulder operation.
Which I still get pains but not as bad so I can put up and shut up with that pain.
I feel like my body’s against me. I’m 26 years old and I feel so much older when I have an attack.

Do you have any tips for chronic pain? Anything that’s worked for you? I am an open book. I will try anything! I appreciate the comments will be from personal experience I am not seeking medical help from my post. I am venting as I’m so frustrated.


Thanks in Advance

One Comment Add yours

  1. Ms Via says:

    Oh dear I feel so sorry for the pain you are going through. I can only suggest you hot water baths, don’t sit continuously for hours, it is better if you stand or lie in bed when ever possible.

    Liked by 1 person

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